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Tuesday, December 09, 2003

 
Im begining to feel really great about myself.
I know, youre all sitting at home wondering: "geez, why is natalie feeling so great about herself right now? i already know that she's hot stuff and i'd do her in a minute!"
um... oops... i guess thats only the guy in my french class who breathes really heavily and is a guayhole. I hate that kid.
i shouldnt hate so much.
So anyway, back to why i heart myself (ooh! conceited!) i am just overall happy that im not some sad bitter bi-polar beeyoch. I mean, wouldnt that suck? Im glad that i was only blessed with dyslexia, OCD, and ADD. That makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
This week is generally stressing me out. I have choir concerts almost every single day, and i have the paper to edit and layout and yadda yadda yadda. Its actually hell. This afternoon, i had one of those little crying fits, and i was temped to engrave "death death avril lavigne is god death death" into the back of a radio and jump in the bathtub. so alright, ill be honest, it wasn't a radio - it was a toaster.
I also went through last month's dramatist magazine... something about theater colleges - which is too bad because at first i was like "woot! this is going to help me pick out a college."
oh no. i was sadly mistaken.
It actually only confused my feelings about what i want to do with my life. Screenwriter? thats a hopeless cause... why dont i just be a trophy wife like i had originally planned?
no. apparently thats not cool with mom and dad: "being a trophy wife does not come with a dental plan."
actually they didnt say that. if they had said that, they would have sounded way cooler.
did i mention i have a newly discovered substance abuse problem? my psych said that if i am honest with myself and everyone else about it, then it will be easier to conquer.
thats a lie too. somebody told me that online. i haven't been to a psych since i was in 8th grade - thats when i was angsty, and i probably would have jumped into the bathtub with an ingraved toaster if i hadn't been locked in a room with padded walls.
no. thats a lie too. man oh man, im on a roll with the lies. id be surprized if anyone trusts me after this post.
you may not think that im funny, or that theres something seriously wrong with me, but i leave those people with this: no matter what a stripper tells you, there is absolutely no sex in the champagne room.
*sings* no sex in the champagne room, no sex in the champagne room, absolutely, positively no sex in the champagne roooom!

thank god i came up for air, it smells like popcorn up in herre.

my dad just said the following words:
shizzle
bizzle
crizzle
mizzle
dizzle
fizzle
money
bling-bling
(and last but not least (btw, he didnt say that))
shibby

somebody get this man some meds. hmm... ironic, the doctor cant get himself some meds...

I dont know about the rest of y'all, but i cant wait to get to college. although im so un-articulate (is that a word even?) and totally under educated (note: i am CULTURED... just under educated) i have no idea how im going to survive freshman year.

speaking of freshmen, i was in the hall, and everything was okay, until a group of freshmen started screaming about a mouse.
big deal. it was a mouse. get over it.
oh wait, those were sophomores. oh wait, i knew all of them. oh wait, i hate them. oh wait... oh wellllllll.

oh man. so now im back to where ive started. here's another thought for the last 2 days (that ive missed blogging...)
movies i heart and would see many many times:
fight club - FO SHO!
momento
seven - although it was SUPER creepy
finding nemo - "ESSKAAAPAYYYYY!"
kindergarden cop - "its not a tuma!"
who framed roger rabbit
moulin rouge - im sorry. im an artsy yuppie...
royal tenenbaums
clerks
mallrats
chasing amy
dogma - seen it SOOOOOO many times, im a comedy central addict...
jay and silent bob strike back
austin powers - because theyre all great
trainspotting
amelie
winged migration - im an animal planet ADDICT
edward scissorhands - just saw it, just loved it.
donnie darko
heathers

ill continue the list on a later date, when someone isnt screaming at me... aka my parents.

now wait just one minizzle cruel cruel world...
~*N*~

(props to sasha in the last post for noting the coldplay reference.)

ps: mom quote of the day:
Me: mom, did you know gwenyth paltrow is pregnant?
mom: is she married?
me: no. but she's going out with the lead singer from coldplay. theyre good, remember?
mom: thats irresponsible?
me: me thinking theyre good is irresponsible?
mom: no. if they dont have the commitment to get married, they shouldnt be having babies. thats cruel and selfish. that poor child is going to grow up globetrotting, spoiled, and raised by a nanny.
me: geez. that must SUCK.

note: i guess that explains a LOT. but that conversation wasnt as funny as the indianappolis birth control conversation... we'll save that little tidbit for later folks...





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