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Tuesday, April 20, 2004

Mood: dirty... yet clean
Music: Welcome to the Jungle - G&R
Vice: reading glasses

you know where you are?
youre in the jungle baby!
youre going dowwwwwwwwnnnn!

alright, my gals are constantly asking me for advice, so ive decided to start posting some of it on my page so i can be helping more than one person at once.
i know. how fucking generous.
oh wait. pause, tipsy just came on. i have to bump.
*bumps the J-Kwon*
alright. done.
anywho, so advice. heres the start:
Question: "I like this guy, but I feel weird for just walking up and talking to him. What should I do?"
Answer: Easy. Walk up and talk to him, silly! The more confident you pretend to be, the more confident he'll think you are! Just walk your cute lil butt on over there and talk yourselves to death!
but what about, you may ask...
this is when my evil plan comes into effect.
note: do not read the following post unless you want to be amazed and marveled at how Natalie's brain works. You may never look at her the same.

hokay. here we go.
So you know you like this guy right? you spend the first week or so sneakin around finding stuff out about him. For example, you find out he likes golf. Great. Now, sit down with your best friend, and do all the damn golf research you can do. Learn uh... plays... stats, players, courses - ANYTHING you can learn about the damn game. Even watch an ENTIRE GAME (i know, hard to do, but worth it...) so that you can say you did. Then, the next time you see him, be like "whoah, did you see that birdie that Tiger hit at the Comlink Tournament of Champions last Saturday?"
works like a fucking charm.
amaze the hell out of him that you know so damn much about the thing.
you seem so fucking perfect for about 45 minutes.
and then he has to go to class.
and hey, if hes not a big sports guy, hit the next big jackpot: music.
research the band: what are the members names, where are they from, what drugs are they doing, who are they dating, when did the lead singer last OD?
so good.

so now if ANYBODY asks me to get a guy to notice them, ill just refer them to the page.
i am such a cocky lifesaver.
you'll thank me in your next life, when we are all cats.

what bunny? Peyton Manning? Indiannapolis Colts? 233 Yards? oh, right. thats what i thought.

1: Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, find line 4. Write down what it says:
"De cette philosophie, nous devons nous attacher a degager les elements de noblesse, de dignite, de desinteressment."

2: Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What do you touch first?
its open air. the desk is in a corner, and the wall doesnt go any further.

3: What is the last thing you watched on TV? The new Kanye West music video. Its waaaay cool.

4: WITHOUT LOOKING, guess what time it is: 2:45

5: Now look at the clock, what is the actual time?: 2:47. i looked 2 minutes ago.

6: With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?: Box Car Racer. Andy is right, they beat the hell out of my profile.

7: When did you last step outside? what were you doing? I was waiting outside for 25 minutes for my mom to pick me up. I was buying a Pita.

8: Before you came to this website, what did you look at? i stole this from Dbo's blog, but i was writing more of this blog. before that, i was going through everyone's blogs that i couldnt before i went to school this morning...

9: What are you wearing? DENMARK. god, i always seem to be wearing that when im blogging...

10: Did you dream last night? yes. it was about what Nora and I are doing for prom. frightening.

11: When did you last laugh? about an hour ago. my mom told me id look good in a certain swimsuit, and i realized that it was a strapless long torso tankini with boyshort bottoms. pretty much, no skin will be showing. and its dark blue, which makes me look more albino than normal.
well, i thought it was funny.

12: What is on the walls of the room you are in?: pictures of my sisters friends. its her old computer. but its getting moved up to my room at the beginning of June.

13: Seen anything weird lately?: an orange bulldozer was driving backwards down my street. theres no construction for 5 blocks in any direction.

14: What do you think of this quiz?: shitty bo bitty. (sorry bo, that wasnt in reference to you...)

15: What is the last film you saw?: Pulp Fiction.

16: If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy first?: more time. Actually, probably a nice guitar and some lessons. i want to have that band with nora SO BAD.

17: Tell me something about you that I don't know: Mr. Conroy was raped at the Music Man.

18: If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?: i was going to say something horrible, but everyone would take me seriously... haha... uh, i would fo sho end poverty and war. donna nobis pacem

19: Do you like to dance?: oh hella.

20: George Bush: garfunkeled your mother.

21a: Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?: strawberry shortcake glitter mud

21b: Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?: box car racer... hahah

22: Would you ever consider living abroad?: almost did next year. and then i decided to do a year of college so i only have to do three years when i go away to college

later fools, im off to get me 4 prom dates.
im so glad bunny and nora go along with my schemes cruel cruel world... who else would?

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