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Friday, June 04, 2004

 
Mood:unhappy.
Music:the sounds of silence.
Color:gray.
Vice:orange chicken from shanghi wok, because the little boy there told me i was pretty...

hullo darkness my old friend.

i am surprizingly unhappy right now - i have so many wonderful things going for me:
+ A best friend who loves me and who i love.
+ A family.
+ A super-de-duper boy whom i simply adore.
+ A kitty cat.
+ I have 2 nice English teachers who i think love me. Ms. Carman and Ms. Russell - Ms. Russell makes me pancakes and lets me play with her new puppy, Ivy. While Ms. Carman is just a super genious, and the best listener in the world. She's also an awesome dresser. If i havent said it before, ill say it again: i want to be like her when i grow up. IF i ever grow up...
+ I ate orange chicken for lunch at the little boy who's parents own the shop told me i was pretty. I also got a discount. I dont know why - it was either that i acutally was pretty today, or i misread the menu. I probably misread it - ive been pretty dyslexic lately - i read "Sulk" instead of "Skulk" 3 times on my practice SAT yesterday.
+ I am going to buy my messanger bag tomorrow. WAHOO.
+ Hannah loves me. I love Hannah.
+ I'm not sick anymore. For reals, y'all.
+ None of my fish have died recently.
+ My mother isnt home.
+ I have a new cell phone plan. Soon, Lesley will be "in" and then we can talk ALL THE FUCKING TIME - and there will be nothing that anyone can do about it - because it will be FREE! (to some extent)
+ They have a "hey-ya" ringtone. I just cant afford it.
+ We have 1 week left in school.

Okay, then theres this really angry, spoiled, bitter (acc. to Lesley) side of me that i just CANNOT restrain:

- my mother is being REALLY pushy about studying. She considers my 4 week screenwriting course a "three thousand dollar vacation." Dude, when the info packet says the only time i will be able to call you is "between 11-12 on weeknights, and 10-12 on weekend nights" you KNOW, you just know, that you will be very very busy...
- i am working 5 weeks instead of 3. I will be sitting in front of a scanner for 7 hours a day. wahoo?
- My legs were REALLY smooth after i got out of the shower last night (like the smoothest theyve ever been...) and i walked out of my bathroom, the window was open, it was freezing, i got goosebumps, and my legs were prickly before the top of the hour.
- I can't get a hold of Tim. His sister doesnt like to tell him when i call. He also thinks that i got a new cell phone number since i changed plans, so he wont be calling me. I just realized that. FUCK. I will try again later.
- I feel like death. No. really. i do.
- CHS plans on starting detention next year, AND implementing this completely rediculous dress code: no flip-flops, no spagetti straps, no bra straps showing, no underwear showing, skirts have to be longer than fingers, no cleavage, etc. Bunny will die when they restrict cleavage... SAD.
- Somebody special died. not kidding.
- I didnt go to the camp out last night. There was no alcohol, almost no drugs (stupid mitch) and they bought a $50 van. Everybody had an awesome time, and i missed it so i could cry when i bombed my SAT practice test and then spent 2 hours studying more with my mother.
- I cut my toe.
- My watch is dirty.
- My new cell phone is ALREADY scratched.
- People are afraid of me.
- So-and-so gets back into town tonight.
- I am a projecting spoiled brat.
- I am tired.
- I am angry.
- And god damn it, nobody is home to play fusion frenzy with me.

cruel cruel world, you get crueler every day...
~*N*~





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