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Monday, August 16, 2004

 
Mood: a shitty one
Music: remedy - jason mraz. its the only thing that is keeping me from killing myself.
Color: black. the color of my emo soul.
Vice: no sleep.

sup bitches.
i am having a terrible day.
i had a mediocre weekend. So it is not making up for the terrible day.
went to ashland with the Fam. Got up at 5AM so i would make it in time to see Tim's play. It was cool. I got to see everything that they did for 2 weeks. To bad there was a girl that reminded me EXACTLY of Mandy Riffe, and another one of Clif. Bwahah. Oh, and there was this one kid that looked like Tim.
Anywho, saw some plays: The Royal Family, Humble Boy, and Raisin in the Sun - my fav by far. it was just so beautifully put together... and i only fell asleep for 2 minutes - as the others, i fell asleep for part of the second act (out of three) of R.F. and about 10 minutes of humble boy.
i feel like death.
anywho, made it through the dysfunctional weekend with the fam. the only things that kept me alive were food, theater, seeing tim for 30 seconds, and recieving an awesome voice mail from Dan.
I appologize to all that left me voice mails. I didnt have any service in Ashland. And that sucked.
Anywho, the weekend was terribly mediocre, due to the clique-ness of my mother and sister, and clique-ness of my brother and father. They fought like west side story. That made me Maria... and the guy. God damn it. Im a "theater nerd" and the guy's name escapes me. Fuck you.
Work today was beyond shitty. I didnt get much sleep. Had a few dreams that were so realistic that i STILL dont know if the things actually happened. (i am so confused...) Went to work. there wasnt much to do. Lunch was shitty (i hate you baja fresh. you suck, regardless of what everyone thinks... hows THAT for not conforming!) i fucked up a WHOLLLEEEEE bunch of files (like 20 or so.) everybody was yelling about somebody that they thought fucked up the files, and i walked in on their bitchfest. I was like "are you talking about THESE files?" and they were like "yeah *bleepity bleep bleep* fucked them all up!" and i, being the badass that i am, took fault for my action: "errr, no they didnt. I did that."
"You did?"
"yeah."
"oh. well you dont work here all the time, so we'll let it slide."
LET IT SLIDE? FUCK. essentially what they told me was: "youre dumb, and we'll just accept that."

ugh. now all my coworkers think im stupid (which isnt far from the truth. doctors office shit is harder than it looks...) i have ants in my pants (seriously. due to a terrible idea that sounded something like "lets sit outside in the grass. its beautiful out!") and i am super tired.
i have speed reading in an hour. my mother is pissed off, and is out shopping for a new oven cause the old one broke.
my sister leaves on wednesday.
my brother and father leave on wednesday too.
does this mean that this weekend i will be an only child in my mother's eyes and she'll be happy because my father is out of the house?
Indeed. Indeed, mother fuckers.
to quote my mother from this morning: "One day, ill have my own things."
the "day" is coming my friends. and i think its coming sooner than we think... hallejuah.

praise the lord cruel cruel world. it may all come to an end one of these days...
~*N*~

note: yes. i really am that angry right now.





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